enrages: (my face is too holy for your bullets)
Karson Valenti | {Karkat Vantas} ([personal profile] enrages) wrote2013-06-16 02:16 am

Karson Valenti's Voice Mail

"NO, WAL-MART, I'M NOT GOING TO RETURN YOUR FUCKING CALLS. I APPLIED TO YOUR SHITTYASS STORE, LIKE, A GODDAMN YEAR AGO. I DON'T. WANT. THE. JOB. STOP CALLING.

If you're not Wal-Mart or a telemarketer, just leave a message, and I'll probably get back to you eventually. Seriously, though, this is 2012. Why the hell aren't you using something that's suitably futuristic and technologically advanced, like text messages or email? Who the fuck calls people anymore, I me---"

*beeeep*
drama8om8: (Just w8ting to get fucked!)

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[personal profile] drama8om8 2013-09-30 08:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Calm your not-tits!!!!!!!!
That Travis guy? I was talking to him WAY 8ack and then I remem8ered, uh.
Knowing a guy in a wheelchair and saying some stuff to him and stuff 8ack when I was Spinneret? The deets 8n't important. 8ut it was all super familiar!
And then I remem8ered MORE a8out him when I remem8ered dying in two places at once. In the gold place there was just some girl, 8ut in the other place there was wheelchair guy again, 8eing a complete fucking failure at everything.
And his name was Tavros. Which kind of sounds like Travis?
The evidence is kind of shaky 8ut whatever. You should font at him! You, and not me. For reasons!
drama8om8: (And say "hell yeah")

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[personal profile] drama8om8 2013-10-02 10:31 am (UTC)(link)
I guess Spinneret and Serket sound sort of slightly similar? Aaaaaaaand Octavia means, like, 8. And "Mindfang" has 8 letters.
8oom! VALID CONNECTION.
And ok, 8rave leader! I'll 8e w8ting.
(Just don't mention Spinneret to him ok or he'll get gross trauma echoes a8out 8lood and horri8le shit pro8a8ly and you'll 8oth get triggered and just DON'T DO IT.)
drama8om8: (Cu8ano flame)

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[personal profile] drama8om8 2013-10-03 08:01 pm (UTC)(link)
N8 I 8M N8T G8ING T8 GR8W SPIDER L8GS.
I know for a FACT that I was mostly human shaped! Like I saw my own arm and the diary never mentioned me having a fuckload of extra legs or eyes or w8.

W8.

Oh no

8h n8 8H SH8T 8H M8 G8D 8'M G8ING TO GR8W EYES
SPINNERET D8D 8-EYED SMIL8YS K8RS8N I'M G8ING T8 L88K HID8OUS OH *SHIT*
drama8om8: (Though I'm not the sharpest)

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[personal profile] drama8om8 2013-10-03 08:28 pm (UTC)(link)
If I grow 8 eyes I am going to kill myself.
TW: suicide.
drama8om8: (Then you can call me Scarface)

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[personal profile] drama8om8 2013-10-03 08:36 pm (UTC)(link)
I W8N'T KILL MYSELF AS LONG AS I DON'T GR8W 8 HIDE8US SPIDERY 8YES 8h m8 g8d I'm g8ing to I kn8w I 8m any sec8nd n8w I'll g8t that gross puls8y feeling and th8n it'll only 8e a m8tter of t8me oh god I'm too young and h8t to die I h8 everyth8ng tell Alan to nev8r forg8t me
drama8om8: (Watch it girl)

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[personal profile] drama8om8 2013-10-03 08:48 pm (UTC)(link)
I am reaching 8ut I fall
drama8om8: (8low through the doors 8n't no holdin up)

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[personal profile] drama8om8 2013-10-03 08:52 pm (UTC)(link)
8ut the stars
They're s8 very 8lack and cold, Kars8n
drama8om8: (This is the tale)

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[personal profile] drama8om8 2013-10-03 09:00 pm (UTC)(link)
I can skip t8 the spl8sh at the 8nd, if you want????????
SPL8SH.
Glu8!
RIP OCT8VIA SERKET, DIED OF 8IGHT LOUSY G8DDAMN STUPID F8CKING EYES.
drama8om8: (Giant squid!)

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[personal profile] drama8om8 2013-10-03 09:08 pm (UTC)(link)
I 8n't actually dead, you fucking tool, I didn't pulse 8ack 8 eyes.
May8e I won't ever! Like I know I was grey and had horns and pro8a8ly had messed up teeth like the one chick I remem8er. 8ut I 8n't got those things 8ack yet!
SO I am sure my eyes will 8e FINE.
drama8om8: (Three pound in my waist)

text; A FEW HOURS L8R

[personal profile] drama8om8 2013-10-04 05:21 pm (UTC)(link)
You 8astard. >8C

*>::::C
drama8om8: (This whole town's a pussy)

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[personal profile] drama8om8 2013-10-04 05:25 pm (UTC)(link)
What do you fucking THINK it is, Karson?
Other than MY CAREER AS A H8T ACTR8ESS GETTING FL8SHED EVEN FURTH8R DOWN THE F8CKING PAN THAN AFTER I G8T THE C8CKSUCKING F8IRY WINGS I FUCKING H8 MY STUP8D L8FE TH8S IS 8LL YOUR F8ULT!!!!!!!!

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[personal profile] drama8om8 - 2013-10-04 17:47 (UTC) - Expand