Karson Valenti's Voice Mail

[enrages]

"NO, WAL-MART, I'M NOT GOING TO RETURN YOUR FUCKING CALLS. I APPLIED TO YOUR SHITTYASS STORE, LIKE, A GODDAMN YEAR AGO. I DON'T. WANT. THE. JOB. STOP CALLING.

If you're not Wal-Mart or a telemarketer, just leave a message, and I'll probably get back to you eventually. Seriously, though, this is 2012. Why the hell aren't you using something that's suitably futuristic and technologically advanced, like text messages or email? Who the fuck calls people anymore, I me---"

*beeeep*

Comments

text;

[eras]

hey have you ever talked to that dj kid?
i remember his puppet

consider yourself updated, o leaderly one

text;

[enrages]

his




puppet???
are you serious?
this isnt a joke right?

text;

[eras]

why would i lie about that, if i were going to lie about anything

i'm serious
do you remember when i told you about my indiana jones memory?

text;

[enrages]

yeah i think so.
maybe.
my memory is shit these days, actually.
uh
remind me???

text;

[eras]

exploring some ruins, swinging with a whip, etc etc
was going to find something important and exciting

well
it turns out instead of that
i found...that
the puppet

text;

[enrages]

his puppet?
does he remember you?
have you tried using your font to trigger him?

text;

[eras]

yes, his puppet
sans arms and legs and with a wallet stuffed inside but that is besides the point
he wasn't triggered by talking to me
but i'm sure that's the puppet i saw.
100%

text;

[enrages]

whose wallet???
was it his??
can we establish some timeline shit from this???

text;

[eras]

uh
i don't know
it had 2 cards in it but no name

and i don't know
the puppet he had was a lot better looking than mine
so i assume i found it sometime after dj had it??

text;

[enrages]

puppets are kinda expensive right??
why would you just
kinda throw one
in some ruins??
man, these fucking mysteries.

text;

[eras]

idk i've never looked into buying one
it was sort of like smoking though
in a crater
with
well
i'm not sure i feel comfortable with the other stuff that was with it but that's neither here nor there

text;

[enrages]

??????
deets deets as leader i gotta know.

text;

[eras]

exploded robot parts

text;

[enrages]

oh jeez, i'm sorry if that was like your robot family or something, damn.

text;

[eras]

idk if it was or not it just made me really, really uncomfortable

ummm who all is in your count of this group again

text;

[enrages]

damnnnn.
uhhh
me, you, danny, CHRIS MAYBE???, TRAVIS MAYBE???, octavia, dj apparently, mac, and pissbaby mcgee.

text;

[eras]

okay you're missing davin from that
also does that mean you're actually acknowledging soren now

text;

[enrages]

who is davin??
also yes, im acknowledging pissbaby.
i just dont enjoy acknowledging him.

text;

[eras]

the guy with the safehouse?
talk2 liike thii2 2ometiime2?
who isn't soren

soren has agreed to go to any soulbond meet up you may or may not have if i'm there jsyk

text;

[enrages]

wait there are two assholes who type like that?!!??!!
what the fuck?
which one is sollux?
thats the name me and octavia remember.

also awesome, thanks.

text;

[eras]

well, yes?
soren is sollux.
we have shared memories i can verify that!
he even knows my name
back when i was a robot i mean
idk what davin's name was

np!!

text;

[enrages]

are they related or something???
why the fuck do they write the same??

text;

[eras]

because they do
there are slight differences in typing actually
davin uses the gemini sign for capital i's sometimes

text;

[enrages]

what the fucks a gemini sign

text;

[eras]

♊ <--that?