Karson Valenti's Voice Mail

[enrages]

"NO, WAL-MART, I'M NOT GOING TO RETURN YOUR FUCKING CALLS. I APPLIED TO YOUR SHITTYASS STORE, LIKE, A GODDAMN YEAR AGO. I DON'T. WANT. THE. JOB. STOP CALLING.

If you're not Wal-Mart or a telemarketer, just leave a message, and I'll probably get back to you eventually. Seriously, though, this is 2012. Why the hell aren't you using something that's suitably futuristic and technologically advanced, like text messages or email? Who the fuck calls people anymore, I me---"

*beeeep*

Comments

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[counterclock]

is your favourite song baby by jbiebz

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[enrages]

ugh no.
come the fuck on.
4/4 time, moron.

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yeah at this point i wonder if its all just a fuckin ruse i bet u actually love 4/4 time huh valenti youre all queer for those four steady beats

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[enrages]

nope.
that's pretty much the opposite of what i feel, you punkass motherfucker.
it's because i'm a TRUE MUSICIAN and all that boring whiny shit with people playing the same guitar chords over and over while singing about mundane dumbwhatever that everyone pretends to understand but doesnt at all.

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arethra franklin was a revolutionary singer not a fucking guitarist and she sang about feminism and love you pig

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[enrages]

doesn't mean i have to like her voice.

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[counterclock]

okay i figured it out finally you arent actually alive youre just a creature of hate who was supposed to die years ago but was too spiteful toward the earth to do us one favour of ridding the rest of us of your existence

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[enrages]

omg that's so mean.
you want some good music??
I WILL GIVE YOU SOME GOOD FUCKING MUSIC
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Es9RgQGw3Gk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1k08yxu57NA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3hvJFr_-fM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDWAQq9-y-Q

there's a lot of variety in there for your uncultured ass!

text; i have to justify the dave icon in this case it was necessary

[counterclock]

ok i can't disagree with you there vivaldi was no joke

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[enrages]

listen to the hungarian composers too-- they know how to jam.

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[counterclock]

alright so not that im disagreeing about classical music being the shit but do u like anything with words

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[enrages]

not usually.
i mean, i threw some turandot in there, but nessun dorma is a classic and should be included in any list of great arias.

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but lyrics are a whole different dimension of artistic and emotional expression dont u like poetry or something its basically poetry to music

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[enrages]

i dont want poetry in my music.
end of story.

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why tho

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[enrages]

i dont want it.

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but its good

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[enrages]

i
dont
want
it.

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so good k-dawg

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s

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o

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g

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