Karson Valenti's Voice Mail

[enrages]

"NO, WAL-MART, I'M NOT GOING TO RETURN YOUR FUCKING CALLS. I APPLIED TO YOUR SHITTYASS STORE, LIKE, A GODDAMN YEAR AGO. I DON'T. WANT. THE. JOB. STOP CALLING.

If you're not Wal-Mart or a telemarketer, just leave a message, and I'll probably get back to you eventually. Seriously, though, this is 2012. Why the hell aren't you using something that's suitably futuristic and technologically advanced, like text messages or email? Who the fuck calls people anymore, I me---"

*beeeep*

Comments

[enrages]

ill listen to your shitmusic if you buy me five more bottles of nyquil

[counterclock]

dude i want you to listen to good music i dont want to be hunted down by the cops for being suspected of having a meth lab like my mom

[enrages]

wait is that serious

[counterclock]

oh

[counterclock]

uhhhh yeah

[counterclock]

moms been in and out of jail since i was six the more you know

[enrages]

jesus christ.
that fucking sucks.
do you have a dad??
or like older siblings or anything?

[counterclock]

sis and i went to live with my gran

[counterclock]

she died three years later tho

[enrages]

oh god.
that's fucking awful.
what did you guys do???

[counterclock]

sis took care of me

[counterclock]

the fuck else were we gonna do yknow

[enrages]

i dunno.
i mean, doesn't the state jump in and fuck everything up with cases like that?
still though, props to your sis.

[counterclock]

oh they tried ahahaha they tried hard but sis had just turned 18 so like she fought hard and was able to prove that she could take care of me so of all the shitty things that couldve and did happen that wasnt one of them fortunately

[enrages]

thats pretty badass.
mad props to your sis, damn.

[counterclock]

yeahhhh she was pretty cool

[counterclock]

and then she like became an online porn star which i dont think the government wouldve approved of even though her minimum wage income definitely wasnt complaining

[enrages]

wow what.
well, i mean
dang.
i guess you gotta do what you gotta do?????

[counterclock]

ye-eahhhhhh it was weird when i was a kid but now its really just a thing

[enrages]

thats legit.

[counterclock]

i mean i dont think youd complain either if all you had to put up with in order to get some cool clothes and shit was knowing in the back of your mind that your big sister could be diddling herself in the other room at any given minute

[enrages]

you're not okay with it?

[counterclock]

no im totally okay with it thats what im trying to say and even as a kid i didnt care so much because if i walked in on her accidentally shed just apologize and like buy me something to distract me so im not like emotionally scarred by it or anything its really fine

[enrages]

have you ever talked to her about it?
like legit conversations, not just buying things to feel good?

[counterclock]

we dont really... i mean we do talk dont think we dont she even drives into locke to see me every other month or so even though she lives like an hour out and we chill but we dont really talk about shit like her job or mom or gran or anything