Karson Valenti's Voice Mail

[enrages]

"NO, WAL-MART, I'M NOT GOING TO RETURN YOUR FUCKING CALLS. I APPLIED TO YOUR SHITTYASS STORE, LIKE, A GODDAMN YEAR AGO. I DON'T. WANT. THE. JOB. STOP CALLING.

If you're not Wal-Mart or a telemarketer, just leave a message, and I'll probably get back to you eventually. Seriously, though, this is 2012. Why the hell aren't you using something that's suitably futuristic and technologically advanced, like text messages or email? Who the fuck calls people anymore, I me---"

*beeeep*

Comments

[wirsinddiejager]

NO I DIDNT WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GET THAT.

[enrages]

I GOT IT FROM THE PART OF THE CONVERSATION EARLIER WHERE YOU SAID YOU DIDNT CARE IF WE WERE FRIENDS OR NOT.

[wirsinddiejager]

WELL YOURE AN ASSHOLE AND SOMETIMES I DONT WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH YOU LIKE RIGHT FUCKING NOW. THAT DOESNT MAKE ME A PSYCHOPATH.

[enrages]

WELL, I DON'T WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH YOU AT ALL ANYMORE.
WE'RE DONE HERE.

[wirsinddiejager]

wow fine fuck you too. dont expect me to get worried about you anymore.

1/2

[enrages]

good!!!

[enrages]

[ 6 am ]

im so sorry oh my god im so sorry im trash i didnt mean it im so sorry

[wirsinddiejager]

[NO RESPONSE]

[enrages]

[ 7 am ]

oh god are you ignoring me are you sleeping im sorry im waking you up i can come over if you want me to and bring flowers or somethig??? i dont know how to do this i ruin everything i touch im so sorry please dont hate me i dont hate you i was just angry im osrryyyyy

[wirsinddiejager]

I WAS sleeping but also ignoring you. but fine I dont really hate you either just dont come over with flowers my mom will think youre trying to woo me. now calm the fuck down and let me get some sleep ok.

[enrages]

ok.
ok good.


uh
sorry.

[wirsinddiejager]

[AND THUS EVERYONE LEARNED A LITTLE SOMETHING ABOUT FRIENDSHIP. TIME TO WRITE A LETTER ABOUT THIS TO PRINCESS CELESTIA.]