Karson Valenti's Voice Mail

[enrages]

"NO, WAL-MART, I'M NOT GOING TO RETURN YOUR FUCKING CALLS. I APPLIED TO YOUR SHITTYASS STORE, LIKE, A GODDAMN YEAR AGO. I DON'T. WANT. THE. JOB. STOP CALLING.

If you're not Wal-Mart or a telemarketer, just leave a message, and I'll probably get back to you eventually. Seriously, though, this is 2012. Why the hell aren't you using something that's suitably futuristic and technologically advanced, like text messages or email? Who the fuck calls people anymore, I me---"

*beeeep*

Comments

[enrages]

no, and i'm not going to!

[counterclock]

uhhuh

[counterclock]

what are you 14 youve got time

[enrages]

16 and no
not interested.

[counterclock]

pot is rly relaxing u could probs stand to chill out once in a while

[enrages]

don't care.
don't need it.

[counterclock]

this from the guy who was gonna try meth to help him sleep

[enrages]

will weed help me sleep

[counterclock]

was all that white space really necessary

[counterclock]

look i cant promise anything but its a really chill experience and if it doesnt help you sleep at least itll help you relax and take the edge off a bit

[counterclock]

no ones gonna rob or gang rape you just do it with me in your car or someth

[counterclock]

uh i guess you could come to my apartment if you wanted idk

[enrages]

i can't do it in my car.
it's technically my dads and we share it.
but
uh
yeah

[counterclock]

welp

[counterclock]

so my apartments 100% safe and you could pet my cat

[counterclock]

and bring crab i guess

[enrages]

ok.
uh
when?
i guess?
?

[counterclock]

w.........henever you like?

[enrages]

if i don't sleep by this weekend, i guess
friday night?

[counterclock]

ok yeah sounds like a plan

[counterclock]

you remember how to get here right

[enrages]

yeah

see you then?

[counterclock]

yep see ya then kid